And yes, I hate it.
Happy Sunday, Soothers. I joke often (maybe even in this newsletter before?) that if I ever write a book or start a new newsletter it will be called, “But… how?” where I break down general concepts that you KNOW you should do (forgive somebody else; let go; have an abundant mindset; practice self-compassion) but like… you don’t know how. And I would give you step-by-step ACTUAL PRACTICES to do the thing. Like, forgiveness. I have 4 exercises you can do, this one meditation, this one letter writing thing, this one journaling exercise. Like, ACTIONABLE SHIT. And when you do those exercises, you are then forgiving more easily!
I find this to be the most missing from the self-help world. “Forgive!” Okay, but… HOW?! Like seriously give me a goddamn checklist. I know I should forgive but I could use a little help on what steps to take to get there.
You got it! Today I am giving you some resources that generally help me with something I struggle with the most: surrender. As a control freak and codependent, letting go is… haha. I hate it. For my astrology bubs, I have so much Capricorn and Virgo it would make your head spin, and those are very controlling signs. (Also beautiful and smart and the best, but not known for our chill.)
But surrender is something I want to practice so much more in my life, especially as my spirituality has grown and deepened over the years. If I trust that there are benevolent forces and energies that are taking care of stuff behind the scenes and want to help me… I gotta learn to walk the talk in that area.
For me, surrender has been largely about letting go of the concept that I know best. And the best practice for me to surrender over and over again has been reminding myself of the concept that I don’t know how anything should work out, and what could be happening that I think is The Worst may actually be working out in my favor in ways I just can’t understand.
Here are a few approaches, stories, and quotes that help me with this lifelong practice:
The parable of the Taoist Farmer
You’ve probably heard this tale in some capacity, but to me it is the best, most elegant description of surrender and is something I carry with me in my metaphorical pocket every day. It goes…