Rest, don’t quit. Pause, don’t stop.

Photo by Brett Jordan on Unsplash
  1. Are you resting, or are you quitting? Are you pausing, or are you stopping? This quote is attributed to Banksy: “If you get tired, learn to rest, not quit.” Projects, goals, endeavors, ideas — they all take time. It is not quitting to rest for a while on your path there. Since we’re a society that’s so conditioned to feel shame about the idea of rest, I think sometimes our brain just defaults to that we should totally quit and stop. What if you were to practice resting on your journey? Being in the pause? Beginning to know that a short (or long) rest is not the same as the journey being completely called off?
  2. Think about your “dial.” I work with many clients on dating, and the all or nothing, go all in on dating or totally quit and take a hiatus approach shows up a lot in this arena. Either clients are amped and on the apps hours per day and going on multiple dates a week, or they’re so burned out they delete all the apps and feel they need a months-long break from dating. When this topic comes up, I offer them the dial metaphor. Imagine there’s a scale of dating activities from 1–10 (or replace dating with anything else in your life). If a 10 is being on the apps daily, messaging people, asking friends to set you up, going on multiple dates a week, and a 1 is you’re making zero effort towards dating at all, where are you currently on that dial? And if you’re up too high, where would you like to be? Maybe you don’t want to stop dating, but you need to move your dial down to a 3. Define what a 3 is for you, then rest in that new way of being. You’ll know when you feel ready to move up to a 5 or a 7 on the dial, and remember, if you begin to get tired, you can always just turn down the dial instead of quitting all together.
  3. Identify what season you are in, and what this season is asking of you. There are a few ways to do this; you can simply intuitively align yourself with a season of nature like winter or spring; you can do an exercise of writing down all the ways in which your body feels, your emotions feels, the challenges you’re experiencing and the things you’re feeling drawn to, and name the season with a word that aligns to those elements. If you find yourself in a planting season, you would know you need patience, repetition, nurturing, time to grow. If you’re in a Spring season, everything might feel like it’s blooming and you’re bursting with energy.
  4. And always remember this: It is better to go slowly, with rest, taking your time, in the right direction, than quickly in the wrong direction.

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Teaching awakening + healing through vulnerability + self-compassion. Finding hope in a messy world. Author of the Sunday Soother. http://catherinedandrews.com

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Catherine Andrews

Catherine Andrews

Teaching awakening + healing through vulnerability + self-compassion. Finding hope in a messy world. Author of the Sunday Soother. http://catherinedandrews.com

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