Stop trying to make the “right” decision and do this instead
You can get better at making decisions, just not how you’ve been taught.
This article is cross-posted from my weekly newsletter, The Sunday Soother, a newsletter about clarity, intention, and useful tips for creating more meaning in your life that goes out every Sunday morning. Subscribe here. I am also a coach who works with sensitive people so they can stop second-guessing, make decisions confidently and live the life they’ve always dreamed of. You can learn more about working with me here.
Happy Sunday, Soothers. In my own personal work, and that of my clients, I naturally deal with a lot of black and white thinking. A lot of perfectionism. A lot of fear around getting things “right.” Making the “best” decision.
This is one of the ways in which we’re taught to approach life, goals, making decisions, progress, moving forward.
And rarely do I deem something “wrong” or “right”, because there’s about a billion subtleties to any situation in life, but I am going to go there here:
Trying to figure out the “right” decision is 100% the wrong approach.
When people try to figure out the “right” way to move forward, that is the thing that keeps them stuck. I see clients get stuck in what I call “research mode,” spending hours, weeks, months, years! in google mode, attempting to dissect and discern the best way, the most efficient way, the optimal way, the perfect way, the way that is going to preserve their ego, the way that won’t bring them any fear, the way in which they can guarantee there won’t be failure.
And in this belief that there is a “right” way to move forward — or ANY way in which you won’t experience fear, embarrassment, failure, uncertainty — is what is going to guarantee you won’t make the kind of progress or achievements that you deserve and are worthy of in your life.
So here are a few tips for what to try instead.
- Understand there is no “right” decision, only choices that produce different results. And if you get to a result you don’t like, you can always make a set of new choices.
- One of my favorite ways to see if a decision is feeling…