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What does it actually mean to surrender?
What does it actually mean to surrender?
Happy Sunday, Soothers. What does it mean to surrender? And why do we struggle so mightily with the concept, and resistance to it?
It might have something to do with what we’ve been taught surrender is.
Definition of surrender (Entry 1 of 2)
1a: to yield to the power, control, or possession of another upon compulsion or demand
surrendered the fort
b: to give up completely or agree to forgo especially in favor of another
2a: to give (oneself) up into the power of another especially as a prisoner
b: to give (oneself) over to something (such as an influence)
Yeah, not fun. Love to give myself and my power up as a prisoner!!! Woo!
But on a podcast the other day, I heard this alternate interpretation of surrender:
“The word surrender has significant roots, in which ‘render’ has the meaning to melt and ‘sur’ means super or highest. In other words, the true meaning of surrender is to melt into that which is higher than yourself. True surrender is a conscious choice made from free will.” — Margot Anand
Now, I’m no linguist, but I like that definition of surrender much better than what the standard English language dictionary offers us. Melting into that which is higher than ourselves sounds a LOT better than submitting to somebody else’s power.
But there’s the other side of surrender. Melting into something higher means that… our power, our ability to control, is limited. There’s an end to it. We don’t have ultimate say in how things go. And really admitting that to ourselves — that can be terrifying.
This quote from Elizabeth Gilbert always brings me back to that reality, too:
“Surrender is what happens when you’ve come to the end of your power. Surrender is what happens when you’ve searched to the bottom of your soul and found out this truth, which is that you can’t do this thing anymore. Surrender is what happens when you don’t have any more ideas about how to fix everything. Surrender is what happens when none of your survival strategies…
